Ian Probert has been scribbling down words ever since he learned to spell the phrase: 'Once upon a time...'.
He is the author of Internet Spy, Rope Burns and a bunch of other titles.
Internet Spy was a bestseller in the US and made into a TV film. Rope Burns is a book about why books shouldn't be written about boxing. Ian has also written things for a shed load of newspapers and magazines. When Ian was a student he used to write lots of letters to the bank manager.
Johnny Nothing on Amazon
“Great new kids book alert! My two are in hysterics reading Johnny Nothing by Ian Probert (and I am too).” Jane Bruton, Editor of Grazia
"Oh, Wow! Dark, sordid, grotesque and hilarious are only a few words I can conjure up to describe this hilarious book." Lizzie Baldwin, mylittlebookblog
Critics are comparing Ian Probert to Roald Dahl. And Johnny Nothing we have a modern successor to Charlie And The Chocolate Factory.
Johnny Nothing is best-selling author Ian Probert’s first ever children’s book – although adults are enjoying it too. The story of the poorest boy in the world and the nastiest mother in the universe, the book is earning rave reviews. Children and grown-ups are all laughing at this incredibly funny kids book.
Now let's talk about the Johnny Nothing Paperback launch, here's what Ian says:
To celebrate the paperback launch of Johnny Nothing we are offering a free Kindle copy of the book to the first 100 people who Tweet the following message:
@truth42 I’m reading Johnny Nothing by Ian Probert. http://geni.us/3oR8 #YA #Kindle #kidsbooks
And that's not all.......
The first ten readers who answer the following question will also receive a signed print of one of the book’s illustrations.
Q: What is the tattoo on Ben’s arm?
Send your answers to email@example.com
Winners will be announced on 6th February here on Sarah Jane's blog.
Here's an extract from the book:
Bill had a shaven head and was wearing a blue tracksuit. He was almost seven feet tall and built like an outdoor toilet made of brick. Bill didn’t realise this but he was a distant descendent of Neanderthal Man. He had only one eyebrow – one long bushy eyebrow that reached right across his forehead. He looked like what you might get if you force fed a member of Oasis with a half-tonne black plastic sackful of steroids.
And if you were brave enough to be present when he took off his tracksuit you would discover that his back was so covered in hair that he was able part it with a comb. If Bill had had more of an interest in fashion, he might even have considered giving it a curly perm and perhaps a few extensions
On his right arm, Bill had a tattoo which simply read ‘Bill’. This was in case he woke up one morning and forgot who he was. This was actually less unlikely than you might imagine because standing next to him was his twin brother. His name was Ben and he was identical to Bill in every way except that the tattoo on his arm read ‘Bin’ (the tattooist was either South African or not a very good speller). He was wearing a red tracksuit.
Bill gave Mr. and Mrs. MacKenzie the tiniest of smiles and managed to grunt ‘hello’. Ben gave the couple exactly the same tiniest of smiles and also managed to grunt ‘hello’.
The two men were standing protectively close to Johnny. They were so large that in the confines of Johnny’s bedroom they looked like giants, which they were. They were so enormous that each of them had their own postcode. They were so gigantic that they had their passport photos taken by satellite. They were so humungous that you could spend all day thinking up rubbishy jokes about how big they were and never adequately describe just how indescribably, earth-shatteringly ENORMOUS they were. By no stretch of the imagination could you call them small (unless, of course, you were a lot bigger than them).
The pair of Goliaths were having to stoop slightly so as to avoid head-butting the ceiling, which actually even looked a little scared itself. They were a terrifying sight. Even scarier than a school trip to a Weight-Watcher’s nudist camp.
There was a long, pregnant silence in the room like this:
Book and Author Links
Book promo http://youtu.be/xaWO4tR4oj0?list=UUzLRcpNMLRKKtJhes1s1C7w
Check out the illustrations!
Meet Johnny Nothing.
The Accidental Author is a new series of book marketing and promotion e-books based on the experiences of travel memoir author Sarah Jane Butfield. The Accidental Author introduces the author and this series of self-help e-books for new or aspiring self-published authors. The introduction starts with how and why Sarah Jane came to write and self-publish Glass Half Full: Our Australian Adventure. Find out how an aspiring author aims to be discovered while learning on the job how to write, publish and launch a new career in writing. "A must read for any aspiring author or readers interested in the life of a self-published author. Sarah Jane's never give up approach to life and anything she turns her hand to is beyond admirable."
Authors & Readers Pre-Order The Accidental Author by Sarah Jane Butfield http://bit.ly/accaBk1
Dancing in Darkness by Margaret Eleanor Leigh.
“Charlotte,” he said slowly, as if pronouncing the name of something really delicious, like cherry brandy or chocolate. “I want to talk to you.”
“You do? What about?” Her knees were starting to buckle.
“ About last night...”
“What about last night?” If she hadn’t been leaning against the wall she’d have sunk to the floor. As it was she nearly dropped the phone.
“In three days you have turned me into a madman. Do you think I behave that way with every woman I meet?”
“I should hope not…”
“I want to do it again,” he said.
“Oh!” This time she did sink to the floor.
Dancing in Darkness - a suspenseful love triangle in which the ability to distinguish truth from falsehood becomes a matter of life and death.
Video Trailer - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DPBE6hvqPXU
Available from 1st February at:
Barnes and Noble: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/dancing-in-darkness-margaret-eleanor-leigh/1120980429
Apple iBooks: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/dancing-in-darkness/id954871907?mt=11
Congratulations to Steve Murray who won a paperback copy of Fred`s Diary 1981 in the Rukia Publishing Christmas competition. Enjoy the read Steve!
If you didn't win don't worry, the author Robert Fear has two books on FREE promotion, but today is the last day so get your copy now.
If you would like to buy the paperback click here:
#RPBP #WLM NEWSFLASH from Rukia Publishing.
Robert Fear http://www.rukiapublishing.com/meet-the-author-robert-fear.html has 2 FREE books for you but only for 2 days.
The first 2 parts of Fred's Diary 1981 are FREE Jan 13th and 14th!
Shares and #RPBP RT's please, let's help each other
Robert Fear's competition at Rukia Publishing is over and the winner correctly answered the question:
Which countries did Fred travel to during his trip to Asia?
Hong Kong, Thailand, India and Nepal
Congratulations Steve Murray
Thank you to everyone who entered, tweeted and shared the blog and the competition.
If you didn't win don't worry you can buy Fred's Diary 1981 in ebook or paperback format on Amazon.
FREE EBOOK ALERT!